Legos

I have this mental image in my mind of a pile of legos strewn across the floor, all the pieces there, but it's up to me to put them together. Arrange them in a way that makes sense and build something. I feel I've only identified that big green base and the other pieces, in a variety of shapes and colors await being chosen before anyone else can really make sense of what I see built in my head.

I've always been a person that likens things I don't understand to the things I do. And right now I can't identify all of the pieces and what they represent in rebuilding my professional life, but I know the pieces are there and it's going to take time, information, and support to decide just when to use each one and whether it's part of an individual piece or one that connects two things together. Just like building a castle out of Legos, you start with the base and sort through the loose pieces until you identify just the right one and push it into place.

I'm impatient. I want the castle built as soon as possible. But I know that it will take time. Maybe only one or two pieces will be placed a week if I'm lucky and that's hard. So I'm working on the patient part, the one that silences the "what ifs" or "I can'ts" and chooses happy in the meantime. Happy to feel excited and motivated to make this change. Happy to have the support of the most important people in my life. Happy to be taking care of me and making strides to be the best I can be both mentally and physically. I'm choosing happy even though there are unknowns and pieces that I know I won't be able to use for awhile. And as this blueprint of the next chapter of my life unfolds...

I choose happy.